FOUR YEAR POST

When Google took over my old Soggy-blog from Yahoo, my access to the blog was lost. It recently reappeared through a silly-type movie blog I was posting to, so... I feel a need to finally post something new, something to give me "closure." Yeah, right! I've come to realize that the feelings towards The Great Flood will never go away.

I also have not read the old posts; the raw emotions expressed and the desperate overtones of it all are too upsetting. So this is a "fresh" post, no connection to any older posts. I also assume some of the links are not working. This blog is a product of it's time; a snap-shot of the goings-on in Arabi four years ago. A soggy time capsule!

I've been through a lot since Katrina; career rocky, PTSD symptoms, loss of church friends...divorce. I'll not write about these issues directly either... the loss is still too fresh.

Also I will not touch on the effect Katrina still has on my family living in New Orleans. Suffice it to say I wish everyone there could or would take a vacation for a bit; recharge their batteries.

New Orleans will destroy you if you are not careful; too much drinking and a "Laissez les bons temps rouler" attitude. But off the High Horse with me! I am no one to judge. Anyway, I didn't sleep well and wrote most of this post last night after a saki or two. So read on and muse a bit... I must get it off my back and out of my heart.

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Over four years have gone by since "The Great Flood." Expecting a wonderful, insightful new post from your old friend? No. Two words, though, "I'm done." I'm done. I cannot afford to expend any more energy on the "Walking Wounded" of Katrina/Rita (Although, to be sure, I am one of them).

I must now concentrate on my daughter's future, and on my own. Please do not misunderstand me; I have total empathy for the friends and strangers who have suffered and in many cases are suffering still. But, to me, that's a given.

If I say, while in New Orleans, "I grew-up in Arabi," and the listener doesn't get it, then... conversation over. But if I see "IT" in their eyes... then no more is needed but a calm and gentle support. Yes, I still got that melancholy feeling when Christmas came along this year, and I couldn't take that nurturing walk down Benjamin St. to my Aunt and Uncle's house; to sit in their welcoming den. Their house, for me, was a yearly symbol of love and stability. (I actually stood on their empty lot when I was recently in Arabi. At least I THINK it was their lot; hard to tell now).

How do I feel about "IT" all? I read a funny Blog now, written by a newspaper reporter in Minnesota, Lileks.com/bleat. Anyway, a drug-store in his neighborhood recently burned down. It was a local institution. As his daughter was looking upon the smouldering mess, she remarked, "I just can't believe it's not there anymore!" I actually teared-up and needed to walk out into the sunshine for a bit and calm down. It still amazes me that after all this time has passed; my emotions can be so thinly under the surface.

So... that sums it up for me..."I'm done," but, "I just can't believe it's not there anymore"

I hope all of you are well. -Earl